Monthly Archives: May 2006

Hope remains

Posted on May 31, 2006 | 2 Comments

Dear Mom -

Today would have been your 70th birthday. You were 48 when committed suicide, and I was 21.

There are so many things that I am thankful for and I wanted to write this letter to let you know. I am grateful to have had a mother like you who loved me unconditionally, with compassion, hope, and gentle kindness. You really knew how to see the special side of life, and you were able to find beauty in the most unusual things and places. You never hesitated to share these things with me. You took time to savor our special moments together, whether it was having breakfast together early in the morning by the ocean, showing me the beauty of things that grow in the forest, shopping for silly and useless girlie things at the local drugstore, or merengue dancing on a saturday night.

You made life extra special for me every chance you had, celebrating milestones and achievements, decorating our home with a magical flare, or even teaching me lessons in your own special way when I chose the wrong path.

I am most grateful for your ultimate gift. You gave me in spades what you could not find within yourself – HOPE. Now, no matter what obstacle faces me, hope comes naturally. The hope you instilled within me is strong, undying and focused. Through you, I have accomplished much and lived a very determined life–and have stopped along the way to enjoy all of the special things that make life magical.

I know you are watching over me, I feel your presence every day, and the intuitive wisdom I rely upon so strongly is really your spirit guiding me through the journey of life. Your love lives within me, and the ability to have hope is a gift that I will cherish and be thankful for every day of my life.

You were my Mother – you were beautiful and magical. I am eternally grateful to have known you.

Love Susan

→ 2 Comments

Posted in Letters to Mom

5 things I would rather be doing

Posted on May 30, 2006 | 1 Comment

1. Reading Harry Potter or Lord of the Rings on the front porch of the beach house

2. Attending the Lord of the Rings Symphony with friends

3. Hanging out with my friendly neighbor while drinking really good red wine and talking about gardening

4. Listening to Irish music at the vineyard on a cool autumn day watching the kids roll down the hill

5. Travelling around Scotland and the UK investigating haunted castles

→ 1 Comment

Tagged

Motivation Found

Posted on May 24, 2006 | 2 Comments

I found my motivation thanks to the Fitting it In podcast.

Hopefully I can hold on to it this time. I have even started journaling my food, nutrients and activities on FitDay.

I am now back on track with my health odyssey.

Wish me luck.

→ 2 Comments

Posted in Random Ramblings

Today is Grateful Wednesday, and there are so many things that I am grateful everyday – but today I am honoring my home and my neighborhood. I thank God each day that I have a home to go to, and … Continue reading →

→ 1 Comment

Posted on May 24, 2006

Fitting it In

Posted on May 18, 2006 | Leave a comment

A funny and unique connection was made in my life the other day. I think that in the bigger picture, there is a reason why these things happen. That, however, is a topic for another post.

In the midst of my frustration about my health and my obsession with Harry Potter, I found a new website/blog a & podcast called “Fitting it In“. This is a blog/podcast combo about a woman, Melissa Anelli, who is trying to change her lifestyle and make health a priority by working it in to a VERY busy life. Melissa is a journalist by day and runs the VERY successful website, The Leaky Cauldron(a Harry Potter news/fansite), by night. She also hosts a weekly Harry Potter Podcast called PotterCast.

Needless to say, she is EXTREMELY busy and is trying to figure out how to change her lifestyle and make health a priority (by making time and fitting it in). Does this sound familiar? It DOES TO ME!!!!

With 2 kids, a household to run, a full-time executive level job, a really BIG dog, a cat and a husband who works nights – I have all of the excuses in the world not to fit it in. And BELIEVE me I have (and AM) using them.

As a result of this I find myself as a middle-aged woman who has not been able to invest the time and focus on health – my weight and health complaints have increased significantly over the past few years. I am sick and tired of it.

I have tried every diet and program known to (wo)man and I am OVER it. Nothing works, nothing is getting at the very foundation of the problem. I need to change my approach.

Back to Fitting it In
I have now subscribed to the podcast, and am learning about the struggles that Melissa is facing. This is an awesome ‘Reality-Podcast’ about her attempt at changing her life. She has a very sensible co-host & trainer, Chris Kelly, who has a very sensible and manageable approach…probably the most practical I have ever seen.

The website has an overview of the approach, her mealplan, and workouts. On the podcast, the review each week and talk about small goals for each upcoming week.

What’s in this for me?
I don’t know yet, but I have already started to incorporate ideas into my day (I have only been listening/reading for 2 days). I don’t know, but I think I may be on to something. I will surely post progress (or frustrations here).

Go check it out!
Fitting it In
You can also subscribe to the podcast through iTunes.

→ Leave a comment

Posted in Fitness & Health

Eldest

Posted on May 18, 2006 | Leave a comment

Salima arrived to visit with us last night. She is the eldest of your grandchildren – uniquely beautiful and graceful, she seems to be so alive with wonder and excitement of life’s possibilities. She is 18.

She loves vintage clothing, flowery perfumes, unique jewelry, and makeup–all of the ‘lady things’ you and I used to shop for and enjoy together. I remember we used to spend Friday evenings together shopping for these items on a very limited budget, painstakingly trying on colors, fragrances, jewelry. I remember giggling with you over silly things we would find, returning home and carefully spreading out and surveying our purchases on the bed – thoroughly enjoying our ‘lady’ time together. I was 18.

She looks so much like Linda. She has inherited her talent and flare for all things artistic and beautiful, which Linda inherited from you. She has the same ‘hippy’ quality about her, I keep catching glimpses of her out of the corner of my eye and have to remind myself that she is my niece, not my sister. Funny how our kids all turn out to be new versions of ourselves.

I wish she knew you. I wish you could know her.

I miss you.

Love Susan

→ Leave a comment

Posted in Letters to Mom

I am grateful for the Morning. Just before dawn when the grass is wet and the air still is still crisp with the smell of night. The song of the first birds in the dark, just as the moon is … Continue reading →

→ Leave a comment

Posted on May 17, 2006

Have you seen my motivation?

Posted on May 16, 2006 | 4 Comments

I seemed to have lost it.

Why is it so hard for me to get serious about fitting in exercise on a regular basis? I can do it for a few weeks and then, BAM – something happens to thow me off the wagon – then I roll down the hill and fall off the cliff. It takes FOREVER for me to climb back up. One of my health goals this year is to lose 30lbs by September. I am not going to get there by doing the same thing I have been doing – nothing.

“The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting different results.”

Well, that’s pretty much what I have been doing. It is true then, I am insane.

Can someone PLEASE help me?

→ 4 Comments

Posted in Random Ramblings

What will I see?

Posted on May 12, 2006 | 1 Comment

To see a world in a grain of sand
And heaven in a wild flower
Hold infinity in the palm of your hand
And eternity in an hour.

— William Blake

→ 1 Comment

Posted in Quotations

The Rain Song

Posted on May 10, 2006 | 1 Comment

I woke up this morning with Led Zeppelin on my mind.

The Rain Song
(Page/Plant)

This is the springtime of my loving – the second season I am to know
You are the sunlight in my growing – so little warmth I’ve felt before.
It isn’t hard to feel me glowing – I watched the fire that grew so low. It is the summer of my smiles – flee from me Keepers of the Gloom.
Speak to me only with your eyes. It is to you I give this tune.
Ain’t so hard to recognize – These things are clear to all from
time to time.

Talk Talk – I’ve felt the coldness of my winter
I never thought it would ever go. I cursed the gloom that set upon us…
But I know that I love you so

These are the seasons of emotion and like the winds they rise and fall
This is the wonder of devotion – I see the torch we all must hold.
This is the mystery of the quotient – Upon us all a little rain must fall.

→ 1 Comment

Posted in Quotations